Mission on Muchness

life, thoughts

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“The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.”

We’ve all been down the rabbit hole once or a few times in our lives. Possibly a few times since this morning. 🙋🏻 Yes, me since sunrise with orbits of thoughts around my head.

It happens during interminable unproductive meetings. It maddens from the misery of a long, un-prioritized task list. It materializes every time we complicate simplicity and tighten the noose of expectations.

The rabbit hole is the unproductive, undirected and chaotic mess of thoughts that paralyze our movement — it can be quite discomforting to progress because it feels like defeat and second guesses, something I’ve felt on and off the past couple months while soul searching my next career move and adjusting to my new life.

“You used to be much more… “muchier.” You’ve lost your muchness.”

If you’re like me, struggling to conceptualize what it is you truly, deep-down-in-your-heart want for the performance of your life, then you are probably not illustrating that which makes for your muchness. And the reason I say performance is because our stories can be rewritten and revised as we are the pen holders, or in my current situation the author behind the cursor.

Your muchness — the essence of your heart and the light in your soul, your plain and simple awesomeness. Your muchness is the fuel that drives you. It is your unique characteristics contributing to the world, your greatness. If you are missing your muchness then you are not moving forward living your best life, and you’re probably not furnishing your best you.

The world can slowly chip away at us as we grow up, and when we don’t slow down to become still and recognize it before letting ourselves react, we lose our muchness, much like myself. Because in the last 15 months my pedal has been floored, and I needed to pump the brakes on some things while I focused on other things and experienced new things.

I have been internally facing my own fears of taking such a long break away from my working career, but it’s been great for reflecting, travel, family and friends. My biggest fear has been judgement from others, and then I realize that I’m blessed with a husband that encourages me to not just take a job for the sake of a job, but to chase my dreams. It also doesn’t hurt that I did a good job chunking away some money to be able to take this break.

So how do we climb out the rabbit hole and move forward in a direction?

Here are 3 things I am figuring out:

  1. Find the roman candle in your heart. The desire that burns “exploding like spiders across the stars”. Thank you Jack Kerouac for your shared words. Your muchness is uniquely your own. When something ignites the joy within you make time for it. This life is not a practice run. It is a one time experienced marathon, and everything good that is shared took time to be created and worked meticulously on.
  2. Create your discipline. I’ve learned, and not the for first time, probably not the last, creating discipline takes time and it will be the propensity of your heart that will overcome the suffering you will inevitably feel in the practice. Just keep going and know that you are not alone. Habits are hard, both to break and create. Remember to not compare your stride to someone else’s step. I have a strong love hate relationship with discipline.
  3. Take opportunity. That saying, “the world is your oyster,” you were intended to create meaning of enjoyment for yourself. The way you create meaning is to experience things. The way you experience things is to do things. The rabbit hole keeps you from doing things if you stay in it too long.

Remember: while moral support may show up in a letter, during a phone call, or in a conversation with a stranger on a park bench, only you can show up to the door and walk through it. Get out the rabbit hole and move with muchness.

I’ve come to realize that progress is uniquely our own experience. It overcomes our own barriers and succeeds by our own operation. I’ve been identifying my barriers so that I may work through them, and I have a lot of barriers. And progress, it yields its own time. There are no hacks or a fast forward button.

For me the roman candle in my heart is writing. The discipline is not there, so I’ve been seeking out writing friends for accountability, signing up for courses, and now remaking a commitment to myself to write more. As for opportunity I have one that I need to take better advantage of.

Write more,

Dawn

Just do it.

life

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The Sunday before last I ran a half marathon with no preparation or training. How appropriate to title this blog the Nike slogan, right?

13.1 miles and I had mentally convinced myself that I would not finish. I was ready to accept defeat as long as “I tried” to run the race. I felt guilty that I did not want it bad enough, and that I did nothing to prepare. When we, my running posse and I, showed up to the Brooklynite Summer Half at 69th Street Pier, it was apparent that everyone competing was a runner, everyone but us. Everyone there had nice defined legs, even those with a larger build (take your imagination where you’d like – be nice).

I—I, we, us and everyone. I have been against a series of mental challenges with myself this year. Quitting my job, getting married and then moving to a new city has proven to be more enduring than I anticipated; unconsciously comparing my life to others, getting my feelings hurt, worrying and not worrying enough left me stagnant. And if you don’t understand what being stagnant feels like, it feels like death inside, soul—sucking.

I’ve been struggling to find my voice as a writer. I’ve stared brainless moments at the flashing cursor on the screen and have had several false starts to my writings. My thoughts have been as ☁clouded☁ as my brain dump written above. Get it out and let it go.

Completing the half marathon was the best overcoming decision I’ve made since moving to New York, it helped break a piece of my mental barrier and re-realize that in order for me to move forward I have to just do it. In this case, by “just do it,” I am referring to doing something, anything, rather than nothing which was where I was at. And as a side note, doing nothing not only makes you feel crazy it makes life boring. I have been a series of excuses and distractions, hurt feelings, and the kind of worry that left me numb.

I’m not sure what brought me to such a great mental defeat, but recognizing it and embracing it has been re-energizing. Any time anything good has ever happened in my life I was busy and doing something. I was saying “yes”. I was moving in a direction which allowed me to discover opportunities and take me a step further in figuring out what it is I truly want to do with my life. I’m convinced I’ll never have an answer to what I truly want to be doing with my life and that it will forever be an evolving interest to learn (or so I hope).

I guess I keep forgetting the break down and recreation of habit is a marathon process rather than a sprint. I’ve been very hard on myself the last couple months on several things. Running the half marathon reminded me that no matter how many times I fail or how slow I progress, I’m ahead of everyone who isn’t trying. That or someone younger is going to kick my ass and pull ahead. No joke, a 17 years old girl who I know I was in better shape physically almost beat me. Mental conditioning will make or break you.

In order to move forward, just do it.

Pretty Dawn Good

life

I made history being the most awkward person to accept a marriage proposal. July 5th I kissed  my boyfriend on the Eiffiel Tower and smiled as I said, “Aww, look babe we can now say we kissed in France on the Eiffiel Tower.” As he took the opportunity to transition into proposal mode he shared with me words that I absolutely felt  mutual about. I immediately kissed him and said, “Awww, I feel the same way and thank you.” As he proceeded to get on his knee I asked him what he was doing mid box out the pocket. I laugh as I reflect the day because clearly he was about to propose. A small crowd applaud us, and I could not tell you how many people were around us because I only saw Austin in the moment.

I imagine many were surprised to see me engaged. It took us weeks to share the announcement in order for us to share with family and closest friends before social media spilled the beans. Enough time for me to start to think through all the same whirlwind of thoughts that must have crossed other’s mind. No we are not preggers, nor are we in any scenario to consider being politically correct for social pressures.

My decision to marry Austin was a certain non-hesitant answer to life. I love that my fiancé gives me meaning of 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. While I love my words (and he understands the importance of letter writing) he equates actions. Austin loves me selflessly and in full acceptance with no criticism, more patience, more trust, and preserves our relationship for us to share. Not only does Austin love me for me, but he loves my family, friends, and the community that surrounds me. He loves every person that has contributed the pieces of who I am today. He may not have met every one of those people, but he listens to the stories narrated from me and understands how important relationships are to me.

I’ve learned that time means nothing and everything at the same time. And in writing that out loud from my head, it also means nothing makes sense. Seriously, how contradictory was that line? I would have never guessed in my lifetime that I’d be engaged so quickly. Austin walked into my life having better intentions for me than people I’d known for much longer. And he has never tried to change me or criticize me but love me. He inspires me everyday to be me. The good better best. What I enjoy most about our relationship is that we were both well off on our own and didn’t really need each other, but together we share a whole lot of awesome.

Austin went to church with me for the first time yesterday, and the topic was about being a husband in representation of Christ. He jokingly said I’d planned to bring him to church that day so the sermon would address him as my soon-to-be husband. I haven’t been to church in any consistence this year between weddings (maid of honor twice), weekend getaways, family visits, work, and just a constant go. He enjoyed the sermon and plans to go back with me 🙂 I too, enjoyed the sermon and realized how much I missed my attendance and learning more about the bible.

Ironically enough, I started writing this post days ago. The timing of yesterday’s sermon was crazy because after church Austin told me he was listening to a song (Same Love – Macklemore & Ryan Lewis …lol) and explain that the lyrics “love is patience, love is kind” was resonating in thought for him. And then I let him know I had been writing this post about him.

Everything about my relationship with Austin has been unbelievable, inexplicable, and just a vomit of happiness. The kind of happiness plot on the Hollywood screen – the movie(s) you jealously would never admit you wished upon. Honestly, nothing I write could ever equate the joy I share loving my fiancé. It’s a passion from within that is had or not had. Also, I don’t recall myself ever wishing jealously upon a Hollywood plot, but it could have happened.

I jokingly came up with name Pretty Dawn Good awhile ago, in conversation, and in response to the question “how are you?”. That day (however long ago) I pretty much decided that it would be my brand. I’d strive to be stupidly punny and Pretty Dawn Good.

July was several pretty amazing strides. I took a 12 day holiday (visiting the U.K., France, & Spain), returned a home owner (finally closed!), and got engaged (It was also the first day we verbally said I love you). I could have never guessed so many life changing events would take place all at once. In all this excitement I’ve found a lot of inspiration, a deep burning desire to get back to my favorite things, which include, letter writing, volunteering, and doodling to name a few. I’d like to make excuses and say it is difficult to balance life, but that’s my own self limitations.

And on that note…Love your life

 

God certainly made me a hot mess combination of sugar, nice, and a punch of spice. PS. Thanks poorsie if you read this…inspired from your instapic ❤

 

XO,

Dawn

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s the most Wonderful

life

I bought this dinky little tree for my apartment so that I could decorate it with my little brother and sister (something we’d never done before).

I christmas2015never expected to actually have gifts under the tree, and today there is a nice little pile for just me. With the exception of my mother I haven’t asked for anything or shared what I’d like.

I’ve opened a couple presents so far, and I must say that I am so very blessed to have such thoughtful people placed in my life, who take the time to truly know me and go out of their way to make me smile.

I have more than I need and I’m finally old enough to buy or earn what I want on my own. I genuinely wasn’t expecting much to unwrap this year because so many things have changed and plans have shifted.

God truly has orchestrated everything right for me, strategically placed all the right people I needed in the right moments.

Reflecting on this year – I can’t believe it’s over! I have learned far more than I realized I would and have a lot to take away.  So many things to be grateful for.

My nephew once told his younger brother that blinking was the same as applauding. I hope you slow down a bit the next couple days and embrace the moments you have to spend your holiday break with whomever is significant to you. May you find many moments to applaud.

Merry Christmas Eve!

xo,

Dawn

Difficulty Index

life, thoughts

It’s been awhile since I’ve dabbled on this blog. It’s been awhile since I’ve been myself. I’ve been feeling like Pigpen for awhile, but I’m ready for the sun-cut ribbons of Dawn. I’m trying to get back to myself.

I was listening to the radio the other day and heard this ad endorse “delicious consequence.” I think it was a Dunkin’ Donuts ad, but I am not sure. After hearing the ad all I could think about is how humans measure by behavior modifications.

Firs off, that’s weird, right? I am not sure what set my mind off, but it certainly switched gears from singing off-key with Tay Bae Bae (Taylor Swift 1989) to mental meandering. And that’s when I knew it was time to recalibrate.

I have a somewhat habit to justify the goodness of things instead of discipline, and I think that reigns truth for everyone. It’s really funny for me to look back on some of my old blogs and read the mental shift of my stupidity (talk about young and in dumb).

Seriously, I express such mixed messages. I believe in my own standards. The beautiful thing about wrestling with truth is that vulnerability reinforces just how human I am. What’s even more beautiful is the love I receive in acceptance of my weak and fragile.

This past year I was caught in a rip current (you can read about some of it HERE). I wasn’t kidding when I said life was pretty hectic. It has taken me almost a year to recover from moving back to Georgia. I have been in a constant strive and struggle to have control. I’ve been conforming and following my own understanding of “adulting” (working full-time, investing in savings, owning stuff… kinda), all the distractions of unimportant labor. I say unimportant because recently I’ve realized that this past year I haven’t been performing life with passion. Don’t get me wrong, adulting is very necessary, but it’s not everything. I only have one life to live and I’m not sure I’m living to my full potential. It’s been a lot of distrust for grace and peace.

“Those who trust to their own righteousness and strength, and think they can do without Christ, make flesh their arm, and their souls cannot prosper in graces or comforts.” – Jeremiah 17:5

We add words to justify the goodness of things instead of discipline ourselves. I guess lately I’ve been questioning my practice.

“Sometimes I am afraid of being judged by who I associate with and that is dumb. I’m seriously going to work on these silly fears, but I’m not sure how yet. What I do know is that I shouldn’t be scared and I can be anyone I want to be.”

A blog is a curse and blessing. A curse because it makes the writer vulnerable, and depending on the content, it’s a reminder of who we are and where we’ve been. It’s a blessing for all the same reasons. My life has been so difficult lately because I haven’t been making decisions, and when I have made decions the thoughts weren’t entirely my own.This blog and my journals most certainly index my difficulties. Mid-twenties got me all:

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I need to detach from everything and start over. Living out the confusion and waiting for the clear.

It’s nice to thought it out, even if it is messy.

xo

¿?¿?¿ WHY ¿?¿?¿

life, thoughts

why

Do you remember being a kid and asking a million questions with one word, “why?”  Well I do, and I remember exhausting the question so much so that my dad would end the conversation with “I don’t know Dawn, it just is and you ask too many questions.”  As I have gotten older I have learned to be less vexatious in my questioning and more selective in my persistency searching out my understanding of truth.

The question “why” is a curiosity that needs to be shamelessly carried out in life. I know how easy it is to get embarrassed feeling like you’re asking too many questions but the older I get the more I realize the importance of its practice.  I read this article the other day called 20 Things to do in your 20’s (a must read!) and it has disrupted, in a good way, my mind and reconstructed my thoughts. That little punctuated curve has turned to its side and sucker punched my brain.

“It is this lifestyle of “why” that is so valuable as we learn to question the way we all live rather than just taking everything at face value.”

I’ve spent the last couple days in a deep chaotic mess of thoughts, and I have come to the realization that lately my life has been exploring, observing and wandering, but not questioning which has put me idle. I’ve been leaving things alone that need to be questioned, but thankfully that article defibrillated a spike and rhythm back in my life to get me motivated and moving. I’m not going to be timid with the questions I need answered and right now I have a few of them to face.

“People, more than things have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed.” –Audrey Hephern

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Calif. Update: My plans in the career hunt for a position in public relations.

When I moved here to Calif. I didn’t have a game plan really, rather an ambition to run with.  The only thing I knew was that I wanted to pursue a career in public relations. Communication, relationships, writing and messaging are all constituents of me. I want to be a word connoisseur; poise and understood, a masterful messaging liaison between stakeholders’ and their audiences. I want to help prevent and break barriers of misunderstandings.

Blue Prints: I took position with Pacific San Diego Magazine for several reasons, money not being one of them. I wanted to learn the city and working for a regional lifestyle magazine just seemed like a logical decision. I want/need to build my network because I know no one and this job has me in the face of several different industries. Keeping a PR mindset for the region I need to be culturally exposed to understand the dynamic of its people and well this job has submerged me in a sea of “San Diegans”. The decision to work for this company was all strategically thought out. Since working for Pacific SD Magazine I have facilitated an Art event RSVP’d by 900, collected a few contacts in the industry, established new relationships professionally and friendly, and I have showcased my work ethic.

I continue to work my internship with TowelMate and help manage their social media platforms, specifically Facebook and Instagram. While I am a marketing intern and I’m slowly being mentored in that aspect, I occasionally get to throw in a few PR tactics to my work. The cool thing about this internship is that it is all digital and I can create my own schedule. My boss also gives me a lot of free reign and allows me to initiate decisions on my own. My boss shares his criticism later and I don’t think I’ve had a bad one yet, just an occasional suggestion. I like this because rather than being all “bossy” he acts as a mentor, monitoring and facilitating my growth as I mold myself. I’ve never actually met my boss but he has recently approached me about a potential paid position working at an office. The job sounds interesting and I’ll be considering it after we further discuss its proposal.

Life Update:

Home to visit Atlanta (Click that hyperlink and you’ll see why I LOVE the city :)) in T-7 days :] My best of the best friends is graduating and I couldn’t be prouder!

I’ve been hanging out in Balboa Park a lot recently and I love the area.

I’ve been to the beach by myself and enjoyed the sand and sun alone with my notebook and pen. I’ve come realize that I am a social loaner… I love being social and center of attention, yet I also like to be alone and unnoticed. I have a very contradicting personality and I think that is why I am so indecisive sometimes. I ended up here ->Cardiff

I’ve interviewed with a company called Level 3 Communications and I am currently in a strong running for the position. It is a well-paid starting position that entails travel within the southwest region. Before my interview I got to tour the facility and I received the nerd rundown on how the telecommunication equipment worked. The guy giving me the tour kept apologizing about how boring and nerdy it all was, but I loved it and found it fascinating. What cracked me up most about this tour is that a lot of the terminology used I had heard from my ex, I guess his nerdiness helped me because I could at least speak a little on the subject and understand to an extent how the networking, encryptions, hacking, terabytes, backup, fiber cables, and etc. all worked. Thankfully my position with the company wouldn’t have to be a deep technical understanding of the equipment, that would be a headache, but it’s nice to at least have a generalized understanding.

To be honest I’ve been working a lot or drawing. I’ve become obsessed with drawing, it’s a lot of fun and like writing it keeps my sanity. Here is my latest drawing. I’ve really just been exploring a lot of creative outlet.

Lol I just love this:

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And ending on the song I am currently obsessed with (not sure why):

We Were Meant to Pulse

life, thoughts

I come from a small town, the kind of town that carries a redneck reputation, where the trucks are big, the bonfires are rowdy as hell and well a lot of baby making happens. Most of my high school’s graduating class still remains within a 10-mile radius of the town, at least it feels like it, I have no actual facts to back that statement. I didn’t want to be that self-made statistic in my head and I had to get away.

A month ago I bought a one-way ticket to California. I consolidated my life into a 68lb Yamaha bag (great conversation piece in travel), a hiker’s Osprey bag for my carry-on and my purse as my “personal item.” I gave myself one option—make sh*t happen or deal with the consequences. I don’t want to be a person to hold back from doing what I want because of fearful excuses. I want to learn from mistakes and experience as much as possible. I am a firm believer that failure is an opportunity not a defeat. Plus I am still on this great journey of finding my place and purpose in this beautiful mess of a world. If there is anything I’ve come to understand about myself it’s that I am a born wanderer.

So why did I choose the state destine to earthquake off the US map, heavy in taxing, and terrible (I emphasize terrible) drivers? I’ve convinced myself it’s the weather, the ocean, the opportunities, and the challenge.  I miss my family and friends terribly and sometimes I feel lonely but I find myself happy here in the moment.

5 things I’ve learned living in Calif. for this month:

1)   I Appreciate Southern Hospitality—While the south has some negative connotations (rednecks, small town gossip and judging bible huggers) the kindness is often times genuine. True southerners welcome you with warm smiles, delicious home cooking, and playful banter for conversation. The south moves slower and takes time to create lasting relationships. I feel here in Calif. people are so self-concerned.  Unless you have something to benefit to a person, you get no time of day. It’s understandable though because the environment here is so fast pace, plus everyone is busy trying to afford bills. There is also this too cool for school vibe, no one is that cool… except for maybe Kristen Bell, for this reason:

2)   Being a recent graduate is an A** Kicker—I lack career experience, however, I do not lack work experience and that’s for damn sure. What I want, I earn, I do not consider myself above anyone and I complete any task I commit to with the best of my ability. I pride myself for my work ethics.

But back to being a recent grad – I like to think of myself as a jack-of-trades, not necessarily a master of any professional skill. It is really hard to have a company take a chance on a no one. They have to have good faith in character and work ethic to mold and mentor a rookie into a rock star. I get it though, there is a lot of risk for sought after results, a lot of time and money to invest, and well money talks. So my current challenge is swaying the opinion of the opinion leaders. I’m a hidden gem that has yet been discovered, and I can’t wait till I am found.

3)   Reliable transportation is imperative—It would be nice if I could just get by on public transportation but it is very time consuming, and I am inexperienced with the art of public transportation. Calif. is very vast and expansive, so very big in comparison to Georgia. It has been a challenge moving around, but hopefully I’ll have my car situation figured out this week. I hate relying on others to move around, it makes me feel like a burden and helpless. It has taught me to swallow my pride and ask for help. I’ve never liked asking for help, ever. I’ve been stubborn my whole life. I like to do and learn things my way.

When I was younger I taught myself how to ride a bike by climbing on to a wooden fence (because I was too short to reach the seat of my bike from the ground), hopped on and held the fence while I peddled forward and situated my balance to move without assistance. I wouldn’t just let my dad hold the bike and let go, I had to be difficult and learn it myself. I remember my whole life my dad would say I was stubborn, and I’m finally old enough to understand it. Reflecting back on my life cracks me up because he was right.

4)   I’m a very small current in an ocean—Since I was a child it has always been my goal to impact the life of another in a positive way, to make an influential difference. I have been told my entire life I have an old soul and that I have always been ahead of my years in maturity. Since leaving GA I have truly learned the impact I’ve left in peoples lives and it makes me happy. I’ve learned that I have the ability to bring people together, to motivate, to create smiles and be a good friend. Now that I am older I want to make that same impact but in a higher magnitude – how convenient to have grown up in a digitally pulse world. I can communicate to the world in a matter of moments, it’s wild. Now it is just a matter of utilizing my strength and making the difference.

5)   I can be anyone I want to be—Something I’ve learned about myself on this journey is that I have a fear of being myself on a 100% level. I filter to meet social expectations. I feel like I have to reserve myself a lot to not be judged negatively.

First impressions start at the surface, and I love tattoos. While I have a couple hidden, I hold back from getting more, especially in peripheral, people judge for that. I love piercing. I’ve had two lip rings on separate occasions, my nose pierced and an industrial. As I further in my career pursuits (public relations and marketing) I hide and heal my skin back to what is professionally acceptable. I love color… on my hair. I’ve had canary yellow, red, teal and blonde. I have an appreciation for natural beauty, but once and awhile I like to switch it up and color outside the lines. I keep to this clean image now because it really is a determining factor in moving forward and succeeding in my career pursuits.

I work hard. I have high morals and ethical standards. I’m a good person, but I like to party sometimes. I love to dance and let loose, laugh. I like to drink (responsibly of course). I don’t judge people for sinning differently than me. I hang out with people others might flag as a “bad person” because they use drugs, like the same sex or aren’t religious… My judgment (yes I judge, I’m human) of whether a person is good or bad is based on how they treat and affect others. People have the right to live the way they choose so long as they are not harming others or nouns. Sometimes I am afraid of being judged by who I associate with and that is dumb. I’m seriously going to work on these silly fears, but I’m not sure how yet. What I do know is that I shouldn’t be scared and I can be anyone I want to be.

So my dear family and friends I know you’ve all been curious about where I am and what I am doing, this blog will be where I keep you updated. My goal is to write every two weeks, I’ll be posting about my experiences, thoughts and perspective of life. And right now I’m drawing my life out. I’m defining and redefining my lines. I’m making decisions for myself. And as I continue to embark on this journey I really want to thank the backbone I left behind on the east coast. I want to thank the believers. Before I left my life behind I asked a lot of people for their opinion on my crazy idea and not a single person told me I was crazy or that I couldn’t make it, in fact, I received the opposite reaction. Everyone seems to think I have something big to contribute to this world and that I need to move and explore to help achieve it.

I consider myself a say “yes” kind of person. My philosophy is you have to at least try it once. Trying is experiencing and learning, it is developing your personal opinion and refining your taste for life. Trying also justifies your opinion and your opinion is what makes you interesting. So this blog is my story 🙂

Things I’ve done since being in Calif.

  • Interviewed with NBCUniversal
  • Worked the 55th Annual Grammy Press with BeFunky at the Staples Center in LA
  • Attended Super Cross at the Qualcomm Stadium
  • Saw Spike & Mike’s Festival of Animation 30th Anniversary Extravaganza
  • Went to the Dr. Seuss Exhibit in La Jolla
  • I’ve taken on a position working with TowelMate
  • I interviewed with Pacific Magazine and will hopefully be on the team, still pending
  • Went to an art show in downtown San Diego (not sure the venue or shows name)
  • Went hiking in Malibu
  • Went to several different beaches with surfers
  • Ran to the beach on several occasions alone
  • Had a mini skateboarding lesson and apparently I’m not bad for a firsty
  • Went climbing in Escondido
  • I’ve gone self exploring on several occasions to random shops and food joints
  • I cooked Lumpia for the first time ever and it was AMAZING
  • I’ve learned that I actually have domesticated housewife skills and it kind of freaks me out… I can cook, clean, organize and relax people. I’m great with kids too because I’ve been helping watch a 2 year old. What has happened to me? haha

“the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars.”

― Jack KerouacOn the Road